Think of how your heart used to jump when your phone would vibrate in the middle of the night. Think of how it fell to your stomach when you saw it wasn’t him, and realized that once again, he hadn’t called when he said he was going to. Think of how you excitedly enter the train station just so you can go to the place you were about to meet in time – only to find out that he’ll be late for an hour or so. Think of how you spend the day looking for a perfect gift that he would really love – only to hear him say “The gift was okay but you could have given me something better”. Think of how many days you skipped your lunch breaks just so you could give him the gift he wants for his birthday or for Christmas – only to hear him say “I’m sorry babe, I enjoyed doing this and that for 8 straight hours with the boys. I’m broke. Can I just give a kiss?” Think of the time you spent thinking what you can do to make him happy – only to find out he is busy spending his time thinking of strategies he should do beat his effin’ “computer playmates”. Think of how he stole your youth and how he made you feel that you are his possession. Think of the long hours you dolled yourself up only to catch him look at “other” girls. Think of how he called you “selfish”, “ spoiled brat” and “self-centered” after all the things you’ve done – after all the sacrifices.
He might never feel your pain. He might never see the tears behind your “nags”. He might never notice the long hours you spent to make him happy. He might never notice a loving girlfriend behind that jealous girl you are. He might never see how beautiful and incomparable you are. He might never see your efforts. He might never feel how your stomach will ache after long hours of not having a meal because you want to give him something he’ll appreciate. He might never see the smile behind your “cruel complains”. He might never see the sweet girlfriend behind your stressful words. He might never see the proud girlfriend behind your loud mouth. He might never see these things – He might never see these things he abandoned with just a single text message, with just a simple “I quit. I’m tired. Goodbye. I love you”. If that is love then all people might as well leave each other and live alone. Goodbye but I love you? Does it make sense?
One day, you’ll find a guy who will worth all the tears, but he won’t make you cry. You may think that you’ll never care about someone like you did to that guy that you always run back to, but you will. You may think you’ll never going to find a guy who will challenge you the way he did – but you will, and the only difference is he’ll challenge you to bring the loving girl back. Someday you’ll find your own hero. He may not be as good-looking as the guy you always run back to but he will surely show you how beautiful of a person he can be to a beautiful person you are. Someday you’ll meet someone who will save you from that SAME GUY. Someday that SAME GUY’S kisses (even if it was your first) will just be plain kisses – no feelings, no love. Someday you’ll meet a guy who will make things right and will give you the signal that the life as you know it ends. Someday God will give you the guy who will not only compensate your efforts but will make you feel you your efforts are enough and that you deserve more. Someday a guy who will understand your pain will come. Someday you’ll see how wonderful you are. Someday you’ll realize that the guy you always run back to is nothing but plain illusions of your young heart. That SAME GUY might be your first but what’s important is the man who will be with you all throughout and at the END.
YEAH, It’s going to hurt like hell, and it will take sometime to heal, but the point is, IT WILL HEAL. Throw away the pain one by one. Just wait, your prince charming will come in time.
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